


In which the protagonist falls in love with a semiaquatic asshole

by Valpal0720



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Angst, F/F, M/M, Mermaidstuck, Merstuck, Trans Male Character, Will update tags as work continues, fluff mostly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-04-04 14:59:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4142103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valpal0720/pseuds/Valpal0720
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>==> BE THE COOL KID<br/>You are now Dave Strider, coolest of cool kids. You are currently sitting in a hot, cramped and crusty minivan speeding down the highway. Why you ask? Because your brother is taking you and the rest of your crazy family camping.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In which the protagonist falls in love with a semiaquatic asshole

**Author's Note:**

> New and improved and hopefully updating weekly

Your name is Dave strider, and your mermaid boyfriend just ripped out a grown man's jugular... with his teeth.  
  
It's been a weird week.

It all started when you and your siblings shipped up to some camp for the summer. The camp was a bit rustic for your tastes but it seemed like you had a fun couple of weeks ahead of you. Boy were you wrong...

"Luggage... Check. Kids- onetwothreefoooour... Check" your oldest brother rambles as he unloads the rental van. "Gas.. Check."

"A shred of human emotion?" Dirk comments as he leans against the car door. "Oh no bro, seems like you left it back in the pits of hell." He snaps.

"Just shut up and check in, do *something*." Bro retorts, "I'm gonna go park this piece of crap." He says as he slides into the van and slams the rusting door.

"The informational kiosk should be over-" Rose, your twin sister, starts before abruptly- pausing. "There..." Her eyes seem to glaze over as she stares on in the direction of the small wooden structure. A tall, slender girl stands on her toes trying to pin a paper to the booth; the girl's tongue pokes out from between her lips and you know Rose is swooning inside.

"Rose?" You say as you poke her shoulder, "Rooooose." You say as you poke her harder, "Rose!" You finally snap. She turns to you just long enough to scowl before striding over to the booth.

"Just let her have her crush," Roxy comments. She leans over your shoulder and wraps her arms around you. "I know at least three other hot blonde teens who fall that hard, I'm one of them!" She giggles and walks on ahead of you to join Rose. Dirk comes to stand next to you. He just sighs and bends over to lift his bags. You nod.

\--------------------  
(Later in your totally family friendly cabin, that is, if the family consists of an adult and five 8 year olds)

"Wait, so you're telling me," Roxy says as she lays out her sleeping bag on her mattress. "That you not only got her digits, but an invitation to hook up her cabin, too?"

"Well I wouldn't exactly phrase it as such." Rose responds from on her bed, sparing a glance in your direction before continuing. "But yes, I did in fact get her phone number and an invite to come hang out." Rose looks at you again and frowns. "Are you just going to loiter there in the doorway all day? In or out David- and don't forget to take off your binder!"

"Don't call me David," you say, probably for like, the millionth time this week. You promptly pivot and walk across the hall to your an Dirk's room. Unlike the girls' room, which has two twin beds, your room has a bunk bed and a twin. You're not really sure why there's just the one bunk bed... but, you're really not about to complain. You toss your brick red, beat up duffle bag onto the top bunk and flop down on the lower; you look up to see several stickers plastered to the underside of the bunk above you. The kids staying here before you must have really loved marine life... You honestly don't know what half of these animals are. Dirk walks into the room, glances at you (spread eagle on the bottom bunk) and flops down on the twin mirroring your position. "Hey dirk?" You say

"Yea?"

"Did Bro ditch us at a shitty Sumer camp to die."

"Pretty much, minus the ditching part, unfortunately." Dirk rolls over to look at you. "My guess is he's trying to play chaperone because he feels guilty for not being there to help mom."

"My guess is that he wants to sell us to scientists in Canada for genetic research and cloning." You say as you prod at a turtle sticker.

"As if people would want even more of us." Dirk snorts. "Your make believe scientists would sooner turn us into birds."

"Y'aint gonna get turned into no birds" Bro comments from down the hall. He tosses the car keys onto the dining room table and slumps past your door. That is the face- of a tired man. Boo Hoo.

\--------

You roll over to check the glowing clock on your bedside for the umpteenth time and groan. The small red letters read 2:31 AM. They're wrong. They are Wrong and you don't know how to reset this clock. It's 2:35 AM. IT IS NOT 2:31. The clock is wrong and you simply cannot sleep. You glare over at Dirk, who appears to be sleeping soundly. That prick. You roll quietly out of the bed and stand next to it; the wooden latter creaks a bit when you lean against it. You sigh softly and slump out of the room. You take a left down the hall into the kitchen, yawn, and flick on the light.

"dave whadda fuc" rose says as she covers her eyes with both her hands. "dude at least dim the light you're gonna blind me." She hisses at you. You fumble with the dimmer and walk over to where she's sitting.

"sorry sorry I didn't know you were in here." You say to her as you pull out a chair across from her.

"It's alright, sorry I snapped at you." She says right before resting her head in her arms on the tabletop. "can't sleep?" She asks.

"nope."

"The clock is wrong?"

"yup"

"You can't fix it?"

"nope"

"It's driving you nuts and you can't move the drawers to unplug it"

"yup"

"Want some coco?"

"big time" Now it's your turn to bury your head in your arms as Rose walks over to the cubby above the counter. She withdraws two of the cheesy campground mugs and places them on the sink top. You toss her the coco mix from the table and she turns to catch it, picking it out of the air with ease. She pulls two packets from the box and pours one into each mug then turns the nob on the tap to fill them with water. "Microwave?" You inquire.

"Microwave." She replies. She places both mugs into the microwave and shuts the door. You frown when she refuses to meet your eyes.

"Rose." You say.

"David." She says.

"Do you wanna tell me why You're up at 2:37 in the morning?"

"...not really"

"okay, if you eventually do, I'm here." You tell her. The microwave beeps and she turns to take the mugs out.

"thanks." She whispers. You reach into the cooler of food you guys haven't unpacked yet and pull out the bottle of whipped cream. You crack the seal open and smile at Rose when she sets down the mugs. "Ready?" She whispers in anticipation.

"Always" you reply with a smirk. You shake the whipped cream bottle and toss it up in the air, you do a couple cool flips like the bartenders in old movies do and stand up on your chair. "milady!" You whisper loudly, "Your beverage, is served." From your perch on the chair you create a perfect cone of whipped cream on her drink and on yours. You do a quick bow for your adoring audience. She's hardly containing he laughter. "Oh? But what's this?" You say, feigning disbelief. Rose's giggles are hardly hidden as you reach behind her ear. "A cherry? While I knew you where a fruit cake but I hadn't thought it literally!" You exclaim. You place a cherry on each of your drinks and Rose just shoves your shoulder. "I'm Wounded!" You exclaim, "Don't bother calling an ambulance, I. Won't. Make. It." You cough and collapse into your chair dramatically.

"Awwww wuuuuuuutt??" Roxy groans as she shuffles into the kitchen. "Did I misss Davey's special coco tricks AGAIN?" She yawns and plops down in the chair next to you. "You both shoulb be glad thet Dirk and Bro are such heavy sleepers, A tired seagull is angry seagulls." She gazes longingly at Rose's coco.

"Speaking of which, we should all be getting back to bed." Rose remarks. She knocks back the rest of her drink while looking Roxy right in the eye. She stands, puts her mug in the sink, and exits the kitchen.

"Hey Roxy do you know how to hack clocks?" You ask as you slide Roxy your coco mug. She picks it up and finishes the drink in three gulps. She slides the mug back to you and grins maniacally.

"hell yea I do." She finally replies.


End file.
